Okay, so I have been informed that you (my blog readers) don't know a thing about me and it makes my advice and/opinions a bit more impersonal. So this week, I am going to tell you some things about myself - how I am as a friend, a mother and in a relationship. You need to know me so you can relate to me and I want you to have some background on the person you are following. Now let me make this perfectly clear, I do not care what you think or what you will say after I let you into my world. I had to go through a lot to become the person that I am today and I will continue to grow as I become a better and more empowered me for tomorrow. So, you can have an opinion about me - that is definitely your right but again you should now this - YOUR OPINION OF ME DOES NOT MAKE ME, SHAKE ME, OR SHAPE ME! I'm good with me and I hope that in some way this blog will help you to be a better you. I am not closed to hearing what you think and I welcome all responses or questions you may have so by all means comment freely but be advised, you may love my responses and you may hate others but I promise I will be open, honest and tactful when addressing any comment you submit. With this disclaimer being made, let's begin.....
I was born and raised in Southern California. My parents both have southern roo6ts - my mother's side is from Mississippi and Haiti and my father's side is from Texas. My parents had me at the ripe old age of 19 and both are graduates from Crenshaw High School in Los Angeles, California. I was truly a daddy's girl until my father's passing in 2006 which left a bit of a void in my world because I always believed I would grow old with both my parents since there is only 19 years age difference. My mother remarried in 2001 and moved to Atlanta, Georgia. We have a very interesting relationship but love is the core of our foundation and to me that is all that matters.
I grew up in South Central Los Angeles and I attended private school for most of my elementary years. I begged my mom to let me go to public school in the 80's to be with my cousin, we are separated in age by 6 months but by a year in school because my birthday falling in the spring and in CA you have to be 5 years old to enter school, and finally she conceded to let me go. If my mother would have known that I was about to bust loose, I am sure that she would have kept me in private school but she didn't and at first, I did not understand my new freedom from private school but I learned very quickly. The work in public school was much easier and I really didn't have to study much to get good grades and I am a people person by nature so I would learn my teachers (yes, I can admit this now thank goodness I'm not in school anymore) and with some of the personal issues that I had going on at the time (I will disclose this information in another blog) I was able to really get away with a lot of stuff.
Now, I going to be real honest. I was a bully in school but I was not the loud in your face kind of person, I was extremely loyal to my friends and when you messed with my friends you had a real issue with me. As I have grown I have many lessons on "friendship" and I reserve my loyalty and commitment to a friendship to those people I have called my "trues" or my "Luke's" - these people receive my "Ride or Die" chick attitude without question and you don't want to mess with my people in either one of these categories. Anyway, because of my devotion to my "friends," often I was the one called on when some thing jumped off. In my youth, I was not a real talker, a few words may get exchanged but not very many; it was about the get down (the fight) for me. I was angry growing up for various reasons and fighting allowed me to get that out of me. I never caused a lot of trouble either, but I had some females around me that liked to run their mouths and keep up a lot of mess which would draw me into the mix. I've had a few of my rivals, as adults, see me out in public and say they couldn't understand why I would hang with this person or that because they never had a problem with me, personally, it was the person that was in my click they wanted. They just knew that once they messed with my crew, I was coming in like a hurricane - thank goodness for being able to grow up and learn how to decipher whose your friend and whose not and that someone didn't take me out of here before I learned to talk people out fighting over petty stuff.
As an adult, I had to go through more life lesson to smooth out those rough edges in my personality. I had to learn how to be a friend to have real friends around me. I had to learn how to be unselfish because I was an only child - my mother and father did not have any other children outside of me (living). I have no biological siblings or half-sisters or brothers. I have given some people the title as brother or sister and believe if I call you this you must be very close and very special in my life because that has a deeper meaning for me and I take it very serious and very personal with circumstances that may concern me and the individuals' living with these titles in my life, being unselfish and selfless would help me be a mother to my sons. I had to learn how to be a woman because of dysfunction in my family unit, I learned this from various places but the most important things I learned from a man, not a woman, in my life - and to YOU I am very thankful and I appreciate you and your family, my second family now and forever. I had to learn how to be a listener instead of a reactor, patient and humble instead of anxious and uncontrolled. Essentially, I had to grow the hell up and become a woman instead of a little girl afraid of her feelings, of responsibilities, commitment and accountability.
Now that I am 39 years young, I can say that I have come a long way from that little girl from South Central and I am more in-tune with who I am and more refined and ready for who I am going to be. Yes, I cuss a bit and still have some ghetto slang that will express my feelings in a way more people can relate to me but I am still in a better place mentally, emotionally and spiritually than I have been ever in my life. So this is the basic information about me and this is all you get for today; however, over the course of the next few days you will get to know more and more about me on a personal level. If you want to know something specific, email me at: firstname.lastname@example.org and I will post your question and my response on the blog. Until tomorrow darlings, stay in the Mix with Ms. Nix.